Having It All
by jumbledup925
Summary: On their first wedding anniversary, Amanda questions why the Stetsons can't have it all.


Disclaimer: "Scarecrow and Mrs. King" and its characters don't belong to me, but I couldn't resist the temptation to borrow them on their thirtieth anniversary.

Amanda slipped into the bedroom of her husband's apartment, as he lay sleeping, his arms loosely wrapped around a pillow from her side of the bed. She quietly stripped off her clothing, revealing a mauve colored silk teddy, and edged closer to her own side of the bed. She marveled at how boyish he appeared when asleep, and couldn't resist reaching out to gently caress his forehead.

"Amanda," he murmured sleepily in response to her touch.

She slipped into the bed beside him, and quietly whispered, "Ssh, go back to sleep," as she adjusted the blanket that now covered both of them. The seminar in New York that she'd been attending was important, but she couldn't accept not waking up beside him on their first wedding anniversary.

Hours later, as the sun's first rays streamed through the curtains, Lee was pulled from sleep by the light scent of his wife's favorite cologne. Initially, he assumed that he must be dreaming, but then she shifted slightly and her ice-cold feet brushed against his legs, and he abruptly pulled back, waking her in the process.

"Good morning," she said quietly, as she snuggled closer to him, and planted a tender kiss on his lips.

He put his arms around her and deepened the kiss that she had initiated. They reluctantly broke apart when they both needed oxygen.

"Good morning to you too," he lazily rubbed his thumb along her jaw line, "I'm very glad that you're here, but shouldn't you be at the seminar? Billy said-"

"I know what Mr. Melrose said, but he wouldn't have sent me to New York if he knew that today is our anniversary." She tugged at the blanket that had slipped down to her chest, suddenly feeling a chill in the room.

"You're right about that, but we certainly can't tell him that we're married."

"Why can't we? If I'd been thinking clearly last year, I'd never have agreed to a secret marriage."

"We had no choice, if we wanted to get married right away; it had to be in secret, it's the only way to keep our family safe. When we first met, you asked me if I had a wife and children, and while I wasn't being honest with myself about all the reasons that I chose to be a loner, one thing hasn't changed…it's not safe for a high profile agent to have a family."

"I believed that then, I was worried about the boys and Mother, but I know better now." She moved farther away from him, and leaned her back against the headboard. "The seminar dealt with the unique challenges that face women in the intelligence community, and I learned a lot."

"Billy knew that you would, and so did I, that's why I didn't object to you going even though it meant we'd be apart on our anniversary."

"Oh, you…you, male chauvinist, how could I have forgotten to thank you for allowing me to go to the seminar," she said hotly, turning away from him.

"Hey," he responded, tentatively reaching out to take her hand, but pulling back at the last second. "You know that I didn't mean it that way, you're your own woman, and you don't need my permission to do anything."

"Being my own woman is fine most of the time, being self-reliant is very important to me, but sometimes I'd like to just be your wife," she declared wistfully, as she played idly with the wedding set that she could so rarely wear.

"You are my wife, every minute of every day." He took her left hand into his and brought it up to his lips and kissed it tenderly.

"But I can't show you off, I can't claim you…or tell other women to back off because you're mine, all mine."

"I never knew that you could be so possessive," he declared, with a lopsided grin.

"Neither did I, until last night. I found myself being peppered with questions from an FBI agent who'd discovered that I work with you. She wanted to know ALL about you because she's planning to make a play for you next month when she'll be in DC to work on an inter-agency taskforce. She's your type, a very buxom blonde with blue eyes."

"You, Mrs. Stetson, are my type; I haven't looked at any other women for a long time. I hope you trust me."

"I do, I guess that being cornered by her was the last straw. I spent the last few days listening to other female agents discussing how they balance their careers with their home lives."

"But they aren't married to men that are in the same line of work."

"You're wrong, some of them are, and they find ways to keep their families safe. Why can't we," she questioned defiantly.

"We're different; you're married to the great Scarecrow."

"No, I'm not, I wouldn't have married him in a million years, I married Lee Stetson."

"We're one and the same," he countered, oblivious to the depth of the distinctions that she'd long ago drawn between his two personas.

"Scarecrow is reckless and completely self-centered. You, on the other hand, love me and our family, and have demonstrated great care in protecting us over the past five years. Even if we weren't married, I wouldn't leave the Agency, so the family would still be in danger. We're missing out on all the benefits of being openly married, while still facing all the dangers that Agency life entails."

"You're right."

"Did you say that I'm right," she queried dejectedly.

"Yes, didn't you think that you'd be able to persuade me to see things your way?"

"Well, yes, but I thought that you'd require a lot more convincing, I had my argument all planned out, I thought that we'd be discussing this for hours."

"Since that won't be necessary, I can think of a much more enjoyable way to spend the next few hours."

With a quick wiggle of his eyebrows, and a dimpled grin he reached out and pulled her into his arms. Few words were exchanged between them until they awoke in each others' arms several hours later.


End file.
